Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Randomize
