either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
