Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
