In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
