shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
