Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
