Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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