You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Where is the hickey?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
In other news, I just burned my penis
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
