I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
