So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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