Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize