I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I think weed is turning my hair brown
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
