rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
