yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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