I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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