Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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