that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
