he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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