Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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