She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
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