She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
