Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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