Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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