windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
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Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
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Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
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