does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
