that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
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