Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
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If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
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