the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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