I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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