is your mom at the bar?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
