Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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