Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Randomize