I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
