i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
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