So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
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