Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(857): View more from Massachusetts

He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef

(617): View more from Massachusetts

Yo quero taco bell

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(857): He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef (617): Yo quero taco bell http://tfl.nu/9ye7

Replies (4) Good night (1020) Bad night (1303)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

I think my fart just growled at me.

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(203): I think my fart just growled at me. http://tfl.nu/gjsq

Replies (7) Good night (1199) Bad night (2314)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.

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(405): You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts. http://tfl.nu/ijh6

Replies (14) Good night (4551) Bad night (1386)
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(315): View more from New York

Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.

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(315): Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over. http://tfl.nu/878e

Replies (40) Good night (1726) Bad night (7468)
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(815): View more from Illinois

I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.

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(815): I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them. http://tfl.nu/dcim

Replies (4) Good night (3588) Bad night (986)
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(619): View more from California

Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.

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(619): Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this. http://tfl.nu/9259

Replies (13) Good night (1854) Bad night (1416)
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(831): View more from California

The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.

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(831): The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half. http://tfl.nu/bj5u

Replies (1) Good night (1926) Bad night (1276)
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.

(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Those were the highlights of my night.

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(717): Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves. (717): Those were the highlights of my night. http://tfl.nu/jaow

Replies (8) Good night (2092) Bad night (837)
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(515): View more from Iowa

He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.

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(515): He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend. http://tfl.nu/m6dn

Replies (10) Good night (3065) Bad night (860)
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(310): View more from California

you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity

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(310): you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity http://tfl.nu/374z

Replies (2) Good night (886) Bad night (567)
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(310): View more from California

At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?

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(310): At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude? http://tfl.nu/d5u6

Replies (5) Good night (1289) Bad night (588)
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(916): View more from California

Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.

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(916): Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities. http://tfl.nu/3rzs

Replies (4) Good night (1558) Bad night (572)
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(803): View more from South Carolina

I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.

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(803): I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly. http://tfl.nu/xwln

Replies (2) Good night (473) Bad night (813)
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(410): View more from Maryland

I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.

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(410): I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted. http://tfl.nu/jfss

Replies (1) Good night (815) Bad night (375)
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(775): View more from Nevada

We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before

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(775): We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before http://tfl.nu/k21e

Replies (4) Good night (1151) Bad night (371)

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