I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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