Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize