I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
