Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Randomize
