I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize