I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
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You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
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