how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
