Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
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I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
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holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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