I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
