I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Randomize
