my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
