Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
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Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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