I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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