This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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