i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
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There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
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