He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
