i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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